The Craziest F#*&ing Thing I've Ever Seen

I'm gonna let the link do the talking for me:

http://www.mi6.co.uk/sections/articles/collecting_craig_ice_cream.php3?t=&s=&id=02267

I really don't know what else to say about this insanity.

So, How Did That Taste, Anyway?

I was alerted to the fact that I left some of you fine readers in suspense with my last entry.

I can indeed say that Dr Pepper mixed with scotch does not taste like a turpentine fire. In fact, it's better than I expected, though I can tell you that I wouldn't make a habit of drinking it.

I mixed it with a Balvenie 10-year Founder's Reserve. No real reason for choosing that one over the other 12 varieties in my meager collection; it was merely within reach.

I don't really know how to describe it, save to say that mixing them released this intense cherry flavor, for which I was singularly unprepared. A wonderful little experiment it was.

And, thanks to several folks, the couple of days that followed were pretty damn wonderful too.

More. Later.

Oh, and for those of you who haven't seen Star Trek? Go see it. And if you're like me and don't like it as much as you thought you would the first time? Do yourself a favor and go watch it again. You'll like it the way you wanted to initially. (Brad--you were indeed right about that one.)

A Card I Can Get Behind

Being the holder of Plot 383840 has its little advantages...

As I'm wont to say, it's the little things, kids. You too can have your own little piece of Islay.

Hmmm, now let's see how a little scotch and a little Dr Pepper taste when mixed together.

Probably like a turpentine fire.

(Takes a sip)

Oh my.

Read: Starman, by James Robinson, Tony Harris, et al

Watch: Le doulos (dir. Jean-Pierre Melville, 1962)

Listen to: On the Ropes, by Mint Royale

5 Quick Things and a Bonus

1) After having watched them again recently, I maintain that Mission: Impossible II is the best of that series. I'd also argue it's John Woo's best American film.

2) All of this "Texas should be its own country again" crap has got me lamenting that Kinky Friedman didn't win his gubernatorial bid. My old home state would be a better place, I think.

3) Ran across a slim little volume this evening, quite by happenstance, entitled, The Penguin Book of Gaslight Crime. I really must get to reading it...once I finish The God Delusion, The Road,Godel, Escher, Bach, Starman Omnibus, Vol. 2, and My Silent War.

4) This is the number of days I've been coughing my lungs out. You'd think I could, you know, stop already.

5) So, when I first heard about the new Star Trek film, I was skeptical, which gave way to cautious optimism, which in turn gave way to bona fide excitement, which has now given way to purchasing the cereal. I must be mad.

Finally, an image I've been meaning to post for a while...one I haven't seen elsewhere. Enjoy.

And look at that...it's hell time. 'Night everybody.

Castor chrononautis or: How I Learned to Stop Saving and Love the Impulse Buy

Q: What do you do when you walk into a used book store and come across something like this?

A: Shell out the $2.98 without even thinking, the idiot's grin spreading slowly across your face, in nerd-shock that you've actually found a book called...ahem...Time Beavers.

As if you needed more convincing of the value of this impulse buy, here's the back cover summary:

"An epic historical adventure that takes the reader on an historical odyssey from 17th century France to the Lincoln presidency, from the final days of the Third Reich to the Great Dam of Time where the eternal Time Beavers battle to protect the very essence of reality!"

What a steal, kids. What. A. Steal.

To you readers of these rambles, my apologies for being gone so long. I'll be back, with more musings, in the not-too-distant.

Inspiration

I really don't have anything to say, except would you look at that.

'Smatter?

The matter? Nothing really, save that I'm currently sporting a headache roughly the size of Montana. I'm afraid this is not the time for focused thought.

Yet, I'm here. Thus, a smattering.

First off, here's something I require from you all, you steadfast readers of my meager, meandering chronicle. I have recently discovered the glory of swearing by saying, "Trousers!" Do this. Do it with a British accent. Be fruitful with this expression and let it spread throughout the land. Do me proud.

You know what, kids? Dr. Pepper made with pure cane sugar is better than almost any scotch. (Note, I said almost. I've still got my eye on that Bunnahabhain 25-year.)

I lament what a bad moviegoer I've become. Used to be, back in my non-comic reading, non-suit wearing, non-scotch drinking days, I'd see damn near anything that came to my local multiplex. And I live across the street from one now, but I'm lucky if I see one movie at the screen every couple of weeks. It's not so much that I am diverting my so-called disposable income to other pursuits, so much as it is the fact that I just flat out don't care about seeing everything anymore. I remember believing that any film was worth watching (even Salo). I suppose I still do believe that, but I expend no effort in putting that principle into practice. My real hope is that my sense of curiosity isn't in a state of atrophy.

Along those lines, I'm pretty well burned out on superhero comics. At least current superhero comics. And while I love books like Queen & Country & Fell, they don't come out with any regularity (or, you know, at all for quite some time). However, here are the 7 books that you should be reading. This is not some edgy underground list or a small catalog proving how much more sophisticated my taste is for reading only books published by Drawn & Quarterly. They're just good books. Go read them. Drop whatever comic you're buying out of habit (Trinity) and pick up one of these:

Criminal
Zorro
The Lone Ranger
Incognito
FreakAngels (Start at the bottom of the page. It's free. You are, officially, without excuse.)
Madame Xanadu
Rasl

Some webular curiosities:

Curiosity #1, in which the author indicts Fox Studios for its dicketry with his own brand of dickery. http://www.cracked.com/blog/fox-can-eat-several-dicks/

I suppose I could judge this guy, but if this kind of crap had happened to Bond, we all know I'd react with similar charm and grace.

Curiosity #2, in which we find the author expounding on the virtues of the Cinema of Jason Statham: http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=67077201&blogID=461660900

There are certainly exceptions to Mr. Oswalt's argument, but how do you not love something that includes the phrase "fuck an explosion?"

Curiosity #3, in which we find the author, with the utmost clever-clever tone, defending Frank Miller's celluloid psychological upheaval. http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=82986370&blogID=461565928

While I still haven't seen the film, I can't imagine liking it. However, there's some truth to be found in Mr. Baker's review. I also particularly respect the fact that he's defending a friend (see some of the usual boards for more info, if you can stand the boards that long).

Curiosity #4, in which I find, thanks to spotting it on the Occasional Superheroine blog, an unhealthy fascination. http://video.yahoo.com/watch/4242098/11392286

In other news, I live in a place where--on the morrow--the high will be lower than the low. Why do I that again? Trousers!

Seriously, do any of you have ANY deliriously happy music you can recommend? Not heroic. Not inspiring. Happy. I need the musical equivalent of Eric Joyner's Robots & Donuts. See example below, in which robots are fending off a donut invasion. (By the way, go buy this book. Now.)

A conversation I overheard the other day, the topic being Tim Sale's artistic rendering of Batman. (Groan.) Here we go:

Fanboy 1: "So do you prefer Batman with the long ears or the short ears?"
Fanboy 2: "Short ears."
Fanboy 1: "And do you prefer them in the middle or in the back?"
Fanboy 2: "I don't understand the question."

At this point, I had to walk away. I'm not sure whether it was because I was going to start laughing or join in. Six of one...

You know that feeling that wells in the pit of your stomach when your friendly neighborhood video store doesn't have the Blu-Ray version of the movie/show you're searching for? That's called Blu-Rage, kids. Gotta learn to control that. Copyright pending.

Speaking of movies, it's 2009. This means that the following films will be 10 years old this year: Magnolia, Eyes Wide Shut, The Limey, Fight Club, The Matrix, The Mission (To), The Insider, Three Kings, All About My Mother, The Thomas Crown Affair, and Episode I. Does this fact just seem OUTRIGHT WRONG to anyone else? I may not feel aged, but I do feel old.

Wow. Headache's all but gone. How 'bout that?

Hey, Sleep? I'm on my way.

I'll end tonight by saying thanks to all of you who follow this blog. That you care at all about what I have to say is heartening, to say the least. And I look forward to my eventual trip to Norway, where I can apparently anticipate a reception resembling unconditional worship.


Read: The Road by Cormac McCarthy
Watch: Sparrow (dir. Johnnie To, 2008) [Two words: pickpocket showdown.]
Listen to: Born to Hustle: A Collection of Rhythm and Blues by Various Artists